Last night during a sleepy, thoughtful, dreamer explosion of words that only best friends can keep up with Hayley and I came to the conclusion of a celebrations and frustrations book. I believe in feeling emotions. In not denying yourself the raw moments of pure happiness and all the same the moments of pure sadness. Allowing yourself to feel teaches you about you, helps you understand whats good and whats not so good for that heart that you spend so much of your life trying to find the key to. Cause your own heart and soul and thoughts and dreams and frusterations and misunderstandings, those are the most important. Cause how can you tackle those of the world when you aren't in touch with your own. Life is so good, but Im not gonna lie and say that every minute I love everything or that I dont have moments where I wouldn't mind staying in bed, or when I call my mom three times in a row just to whine, to someone that I know will tell me its all gonna be ok. Cause without those moments, the moments where everything feels right and you are inspired and ready to take on everyday with the biggest smile you can muster just aren't as good. So...
celebrations, likes, loves, inspirations, all things that make my heart flutter and soar
- the cozy cool feel of fall, that calls for scarves and mocassins, sweaters and apple cider
- the taking care of myself that I did this week, sleeping extra, taking a day off cause my body said so
- spending the evening in santa cruz with two of my favorite ladies chatting about all things life, window shopping and real shopping and eating dang good food
- brainstorming with Jess and getting this process of planning RYLA underway
- the absolutely amazing out of this world kiddos that are gonna take Interact to the next level
-my mama, and how much ive been missing her lately. how much i love every piece of her cause she is just that, my mama. and she'll forever be one of the coolest people I know
-the hope in my heart that the El Salvador study abroad program is sneaking its way into, the listening I've done to find it in that place, and the growing excitement and feeling of "yep this ones the right one"
- Halloween costumes I decided on tonight
-the quirky little life Mandy and I have created in this room... and having it to myself sometimes
- organizing, redecorating, perfecting of my room.. and my life at that
- the reminder that life IS inspiring... all over the place, you just gotta open your eyes
-my Zachy coming IN TWO WEEKS!
drum roll please
- SEATTLE.. ROAD TRIP... WITH MARGOT for Thanksgiving.. the pieces came together, you North Westerners, get ready!
and cause Im human and raw and cause I think its allowed
a few frusterations, rough patches or things that just dont quite agree with my soul as of late
-feeling uninspired and a little like a robot going through the motions of class, homework.. repeat
- being too busy for the things that i really want to do
- getting the flu and being so tired trying to kick it
- the male population
- green stuff we call money
-relationships i may never understand and finding a way to come to peace with the misunderstandings
its like swept away... of course the celebrations are so much more. but thats why its ok to feel the other stuff, cause once you get it out, you realize its never as bad as it is if you let it all build up. im going to bed early once last night to kick this flu thing out the door. im doing what i can to remind myself of the inspiration that is life, but giving myself some space to be human and feel frustrated here and there.
its all about balance. and good people. and inspiration
<3
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